"there is nothing either good or bad but thinking makes it so." -Hamlet

This quote is taken from Hamlet's conversation with his childhood friends Rosencrantz and Guildenstern. Hamlet considers Denmark a prison Rosencrantz and Guildenstern do not. Hamlet then goes on to sum up their disagreement with this quote. It epitomizes the whole ideology behind mantras and as a coach one of the primary things I work with my clients on is developing a mantra.

Often times the whole reason people hire an executive coach in the first place is because their mindset surrounding public speaking is negative. And for some people they want to know why it's negative, as a coach I say let's not focus on why it exists, but rather let's focus on how to change it.

Through the coaching process the why often times presents itself, and I consider that a happy accident of sorts. But searching for the why is what I feel distinguishes coaching from therapy. If you work on how to change your mindset, then why it got started in the first place becomes a moot point.

Here are some of the mindsets clients have come in with; "I suck at public speaking." "I'm an introvert and no good at client relations." "I feel like I'm too old to change at this point." (I think with a mindset like the last one it's interesting they've even employed a coach--because clearly there's a second more positive mindset dueling to be top dog.)

So as I begin the coaching process I ask my clients about how they feel in regards to what we are working on. Do they think they're good at what they do? Do they see room for improvement? What thoughts run through their heads right before a presentation?

It's amazing how many people will answer with statements like, "Well, I think I'm kind of good at it." "I sort of think I could improve." Or another variation, "I think I could sort of improve." And then there are those who are really in the trenches with, " I am really bad at this and I don't know what difference this is going to make."

Now this may very well sound like a sound bite straight out of Norman Vincent Peale's mouth, but I am here to tell you Shakespeare, Peale, Descartes, along with several other inspirational authors have gotten it right: You think it; you are (or become) it.

So what kind of mantras are out there? There are thousands and finding the right one for you may take some time and some effort. And having a coach or friend helping you discover one can be very helpful because often times they see your potential through a lens that's blurry for you.

Several years ago, I went through a period of incredible stage fright. It was so bad that I honestly didn't think I could remember my lines, so I took it upon myself to employ a couple of different measures to ensure I could do my job. The first of which was physical--being that I am highly kinesthetic I opted to go in to the show every night over an hour early and run through not only my blocking (movement on stage) but also I also went through my lines as many times as I could before others started to arrive.

In addition to those techniques I did one other thing physical thing: I took to touching each seat in the theatre, making sure to connect with full space. But the last and most powerful measure I took was to employ a new mantra. As this fear was creeping in and sucking out all of my enjoyment of acting I reminded myself why I was in this show in the first place and I reminded myself that I love acting, and I know how to do it. I had trained for moments just like this. And there it was, my mantra, I'd hit on it. "I know how to do this."

That was well over ten years ago now, but here’s the thing, I use that mantra all the time. It has been one of the most effective tools for bolstering my self-confidence. I know this, I know how to do it.

And I know that when my clients hit upon one that works for them, I see some riveting changes in their work.

What are some of the mantras that have come up? Well one of the most vivid I recall is: “I spit hot fire.” Others have taken a much more traditional route and employed Sanskrit mantras, like those utilized in yoga practice: “Om Namah Shivaya,” which very loosely translated means something to the effect of: 'Om and salutations to that which I am capable of becoming.' It has a great rhythm to it and it works very well with the breathing exercises I give my clients. Others have included: "I am a leader." "I don't think it, I know it." "No one knows more about this than I do." "I'm moving through this."

Here are a few other tips to keep in mind when you are creating a mantra:

1. They are short
2. They are powerful
3. They embolden you
4. They are present tense

We think by using language, words accompany our every thought, so if the word we choose to think with are weakening us, we must shift them, and we do have the power to do that. So the next time you tell yourself you are good at something see what it's like to shift to a powerful mantra that empowers you. Given time and practice, you can change your whole world, simply by thinking about it first.